Saturday, March 19, 2011

No off button

Computer, Check. Chocolate, Check. Sappy yet hysterical episodes of How I Met Your Mother, Check! All these elements combined to create the perfect concauction of gooey, lovey, dovey, hormonal, mush in my brain. One moment I was tearing up the next I was laughing and then I was jumping for joy. This could be due to the fact that I was watching these episodes after 1am but despite the late night craziness they really got me thinking. How would you want your last words with someone to be? Would you give up a friendship with someone even though you are in love with them because it is the right thing to do? Are certain people really fated to be with one another?

With these questions swirling around my brain I couldn't help it and I just needed to let it all out. To answer the first one I don't really believe last words are always the way they are portrayed on TV or in movies. Sometimes they are simple things like "I rented Crocodile Dundee 3 and it totally rocked." Not always are they the profound, heart-wrenching, gospelesque (yes I know it isn't a real word but deal with it) words that we make them out to be. Very rarely are they that way in fact and often we don't remember them. Still... this should not hamper us from trying every day to be better people. To try and do good every moment of every day. I never want someone's last memory of me to represent something I am not. I know I have my faults but heck, no one is perfect. Those who know me best love me for who I am not for who they wish I was.

As for the second question. Would I give up a friendship with someone even though I am in love with them? Well I kinda had to do this once. It is the most painful thing in the world and would not wish it on anyone. Sometimes though life throws us a curve ball and it's our job to get down on our knees and learn how to not strike out. How about you out there? Would you be willing to give up a friendship? Could you tell the person you are in love with that it isn't right and that you can't be friends any longer? Personally I believe the situations would vary but if its right sometimes you just have to be patient and wait for time to catch up with the feelings you already feel.

The last of the questions in my mind tonight. Are people fated to be with one another? Is there such a thing as soul mates? Well according to the Princess Bride there certainly is. Nothing can fight true love. The die hard romantic in me desperately wishes that this could be true. Unfortunately, the realist wins in this case. Everything is about timing. It can be evil sometimes. I believe that there are several people in this world that you could be compatible with but it changes based on the timing and where you are in your life. Perhaps that first love really is the one you are supposed to be with but maybe later when you are looking back at past relationships you notice that there were reasons why they failed. This is what I have done recently. I am going to fight my hardest to make sure that Mark and I do not fail. I can't quite explain how perfect we are for each other. My friend Marian has even said that while he is on his mission for two years that she will lock me away in a closet and then drag me to the alter. It feels so right. Just got to put my faith in God now and hope he agrees.

Well now that my "deep" thoughts have all gotten out on paper so to speak I am feeling much better. My girl brain is still on turbo tempting me to eat the last half of the mega bar of chocolate Mark gave me but it is also almost 3am and my intellect says go to bed. With this I bid you adieu. Good night world.... until we meet again.

Random Fact: Male monkeys lose the hair on their heads in the same way men do.

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